I need a teenager

I honestly never thought I would say this, but I think I need a teenager. Actually, I would like to have him or her permanently on hand to solve my technical problems. The rest of the time they would be conveniently absent.

A few days ago I was feeling quite tech-savvy because I figured out how to play my iPod Nano through my car’s sound system. That warm glow of smug self-sufficiency lasted about a day-and-a-half. That’s when I decided to try to transfer some audio-books from my iTunes to the Nano.  Since then I have been becoming increasingly bewildered and annoyed. I just can’t figure it out.

My confusion began when the audio-books automatically stored themselves in the Podcasts file. I don’t know why they did that. They didn’t ask me if that’s where they should live. They just moved in there.

Then I discovered that iTunes had “upgraded” itself, and we all know what that means. Some of the familiar attributes of the site have disappeared, and now it wants to match my files—whatever that means. Matching takes a long time, as I think I already discovered through Match.com. Perhaps iTunes is trying to copy my Downton Abbey videos to put on the cloud. That would be nice if there is an angel somewhere up on that cloud who has not yet seen season one.

Undaunted, I went to the iTunes website to seek assistance. Today I got a response from Kenichi.  His advice seems straightforward enough, except that I can’t do what he suggests. To begin with, he says, “Select the iPod in iTunes.” Where? How? I don’t see this option anywhere. Either his screen doesn’t look like mine, or I’m dumber than a sack of hammers. Actually, I know some hammers that are smarter than I feel right now. It’s like not being able to find the “start” button.

iTunes, let me whisper something in your ear. “Spotify.”  I hear they are pretty good.