. . . and don’t come back!

Molly Jung-Fast, Editor-in-Chief of the Daily Beast, got it right when she wrote today “America Finally Breaks Up With Her Abusive Boyfriend.”

As a Canadian watching from the sidelines for the past four years, I feel the analogy fits perfectly. When you watch a close friend or family member being constantly insulted or abused, you can offer all the advice in the world but it rarely makes any difference. She (and it is usually a woman) insists that she is in love, that he really doesn’t mean it, that things will work out, that he’s just going through a difficult patch, that she can deal with it.

Photo by Jaime Reimer on Pexels.com

It isn’t easy, but you have to wait and watch for things to go from bad to worse before your friend begins to see the light. Then, and only then, can you offer to help.

Canadians have very close ties to the United States, and we love so much about the nation and its people that we spend a lot of time and money there. We have family members there, we vacation there, we work there, and we have business ties there.

I have been in Canada since 1975 and for most of that time the US has felt like an old friend who always kept in touch. In recent years, though, that old friend has been through a strange transformation. So much so, that I hardly recognized them.

On Friday before the projected election results were announced, Catherine Porter, who writes for the New York Times, said “Canada Hasn’t Slept Well Since the U.S. Election,” and she was right. We have been ripping our cuticles off and constantly refreshing election vote-counting websites, watching and waiting. It has been almost as tense for us as it has been for Americans.

Generally speaking, we are glad that America voted the way she did. She was like that girlfriend who had been looking for that moment when it was safe to leave the abuser or kick him to the curb, and she finally did it. She isn’t sure what will happen next, and she isn’t sure how she is going to get by, but she has made a start.

Like a good friend, Canada will do what she can to help, and so will many others. America has more friends than she knows. We have just been waiting for her to realize that things could be so much better, and to make the break. We are very happy today and we are ready to roll up our sleeves to help you do the work of starting again.


  1. We Americans thank our Canadian neighbors. Happiness and relief ruled yesterday when Pennsylvania (my home state!) sent President-elect Biden over the 270 number of electoral votes. The biggest achievement became the election of Kamala Harris as our Vice President-elect!! Glass ceiling has been shattered. No, it’s not perfect. Klan members and whatever other ilk are still lurking. However, we look forward to giving Biden a chance to begin, just begin, restoring America to the country she was before 45 began dismantling her. Frightening what he was able to destroy in less than 4 years (which felt like a nightmarish eternity).

  2. Meanwhile, I found this song to be SO apropos today and the coming days/weeks of lawsuits, courts, judges, etc, etc, from the White House trying to get in the judicial doors in futility. These are my sentiments about decency and normalcy returning! Check it out…

    Ob la di, ob-la-da, life goes on, BYE
    La-la, how the life goes on
    Ob-la di, ob-la-da, life goes on, BYE
    La-la, how the life goes on

    Sing BA, BA, BA, BA, BYE-BYE!!! πŸ‘‹

    • The lawsuits over the claims of election fraud are likely to be swept aside quite rapidly. The more serious issues of tax returns, Deutsche Bank, and debts are likely to go on for a long time.

      As you say, though, life goes on and interest in DJT is diminishing rapidly already.

      • This WW2 image keeps popping up in my head again today. It did back in 2016, then for the last 3-yrs too. Why? It reminds me of someone, someone who bows up his chest like this. Same fat, bottom-lip expression… as if he is impervious to COVID-19! Who is it today Anne that looks exactly like this Authoritarian Dictator? Hmmm? πŸ€”

          • Anne, I don’t know if you remember or not from my blog-post “Out of Respect For” annoyed with how certain Americans are totally brushing over & minimalizing the pain, loss, and needless deaths of now over 242,000 Americans—a number that is fast approaching ALL dead Americans from World War 2—and all those families suffering from those lost loved ones, is just coldly forgotten!!! And Anne, that is a number that is 81-82 times more than 9/11!!!! 😒

            If this pandemic is NEVER taken seriously and therefore the needless death-toll keeps going up… we are going to surpass the total dead Americans of the Civil War!!!! 😲 How can you call yourself a human being and NOT be affected by that many dead!? Many of those deaths were children and teenagers!!! πŸ’”

            • Honestly, Professor, I think we have all gone beyond angry. We feel powerless. We feel frustrated. We feel grief. We are coping with family dynamics and some family illness. We are learning to home school. We are modifying our budgets to cope with whatever is now coming in.

              Yes, it is a horrendous death toll. We are living with the consequences of it every day.

              What we don’t have is a means to change it beyond voting and wearing masks. In Canada our numbers of dead and infected go up every day but not nearly so much as they are going up in the U.S.

              The difference is that we have a national health care system. It’s that system that is keeping numbers down. We are still suffering, but you are suffering more.

            • You speak so much truth Anne, and with genuine empathy. Thank you! ❀️

              We ARE indeed suffering more and yet we have SO MANY oblivious or indifferent don’t give a shit people—especially in my state of Texas and most all Republican-run states in the U.S.—that refuse to face the hardcore reality of those suffering families!!! I just cannot fathom HOW they can speak the way they do about COVID-19 and what MUST BE DONE with complete disregard to all those dead Americans!!! That is just NOT A THREAD of ANY HUMAN DECENCY!!! They are now much more concerned about a fraudulent election, a stolen election, which is a further insult to those volunteers and officials who spent hours upon hours making sure the entire process was done above board, with precision, with honor and integrity…and VERY MUCH LEGAL!!!

              What an incredible insult to American democracy and dignity! It is just beyond me how remarkably asinine their attitudes are… and of course egged on by tRump. 😑🀬

            • I apologize if I missed the main thrust of your comment. I was responding to your final comments.

              I understand your reaction to those who seem to be indifferent to the effects of Covid-19. I share your bewilderment and annoyance although in my world most people understand the problem. Those who don’t are in the minority.

              I cannot imagine what it must be like to live with neighbours who are in denial, but I wonder what I would do if they were. Clearly the aren’t listening to the evidence. Perhaps the solution is to listen to their fears.

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