Given that we find ourselves living in the future and that the future does not include toilet paper, I feel it my duty to explain the tow rag.
Back in the days of sailing ships, the sailors did not have toilet paper. What they did have were rags. Cloth rags. After having completed their daily evacuations, sailors would engage in ablutions using a rag. This rag (or rags, plural, I would hope) was then tied to a rope and dragged behind the ship in order to clean it (or them). Hence, tow rag.
This term has become a form of insult in Britain, and is sometimes misspelled as ‘toe rag’ but, in fact, its origin is much more nautical and the rag is associated with a verb, not a noun.
At present we have not been reduced to using tow rags, in part because we do not have ships from which to drag them. What we do have, however, are washing machines. Some of us may be reduced to using rags and subsequently washing them. This may mean cutting up old t-shirts or using up some of our Costco-sized supply of microfibre cloths. Either way, we will have to decide whether to wash them or trash them. It all depends on how long the paper-free future lasts.
Alternatively, we could use bidets. It is possible to have a bidet installed in the bathroom if you can find a plumber who will come to your house to make that happen. Alternatively, you can buy an attachment for your toilet that performs the same function. You can buy them online if Amazon hasn’t sold out of them already.
The other alternative is to bathe after your daily evacuation. This presumes a ready supply of water which may be tricky for people in places like California which sometimes have water restrictions. It also presumes a ready supply of soap which, apparently, is not applicable to those of us in prisons. But, for the rest of us, that seems like a good choice.
Regardless, I just wanted to explain the tow rag. That’s it. And, who knows, maybe the concept will come in handy.